The other thing to understand is, this may be something his wife wants more than he does.
Unfortunately in relationships, after both parents have made a decision (and sometimes one parent might not have wanted it, but agreed to it because it wasn’t their highest priority and they wanted to avoid a fight), it’s still that parents job to communicate that decision to their side of the family.
But I had a similar situation to you and you brother, and similarly my dad made us play outside basically whenever it was nice outside, so your correct that regardless of what tech a kid has, ultimately parents decide how to use it.
But it may also be that they know their kid well enough that they know the restricting of that tech will cause more tantrums/problems then giving it in the first place.
Parents have lots of strange rules not rooted in logic or reason unfortunately, it’s part of the insane crazy love we feel for our children. All you can do is what you’ve done, say your piece and move on.
You don’t want that guy. What you want is attention, and he was the last person to give it to you, therefore you think you want him.
Just get dressed up and go to a bar, and you’ll find enough guys who will give you that, without the red flags.