I don’t think I can ever let my parents know I’m an atheist and with that seems to go my chance of having kids.
Which got me curious: can any irreligious people on here who have kids while having religious parents share what thats like?
Would love to hear your stories or thoughts on this in general.
I don’t think I can ever let my parents know I’m an atheist and with that seems to go my chance of having kids.
I know at first it sounds difficult because you care for your parents. But this is your life and whether they choose to respect your choices or not is up to them. If you want kids, have kids. If you want to be an atheist, be an atheist. If you want to dye your hair blue, dye your hair blue.
Your parents don’t have to agree with your choices (as long as you’re not breaking the law or anything like that)… but they should respect you and your choices.
TL;DR: Don’t live for your parents, live for you.
as long as you’re not breaking the law or anything like that
unless it’s against the law to be atheist. Then fuck the law (but better be not so vocal about it)
Why do you let your parents religious choices for themselves runyour life? Do you want to live that way? What would happen if you lived your own values? Would it really be as bad as you think it will be?
I don’t think I can ever let my parents know I’m an atheist and with that seems to go my chance of having kids.
I agree, but probably not for the reason you think. If you’re still so caught up in your parents’ bosom that you can’t notify them that you disagree with them, you’re not ready to be a parent yourself.
I don’t have kids (yet, maybe never) but my mom has made it clear she will get them baptized against my wishes one way or another. Then she’s surprised when I remind her she won’t be allowed to be alone with them. My dad has been wishy washy enough I told him I don’t trust him not to fold to mom’s wishes so he’s under the same rules, and he just nodded and acknowledged that’s fair.
A lifetime of setting boundaries makes me jaded but prepared.
I’m not sure why you let your parents be the deciding factor in whether you have kids or not? It’s not up to them.
If I have kids I won’t raise them by a religion or put them through the expected rituals, and my parents will notice that. Which would then force me to come out. So not ruining my relationship with them means not having kids.
I guess you just live in a very different world than me. I would never let my parents dictate my life like that. They either accept me for who I am or they don’t get to be part of my life. I would also never try to dictate life for my own kids like that when they are adult human beings.
I understand it’s scary. I’ve been there. However you have to understand how toxic it is to live this way. It will be hard but if being who you are means losing your family then maybe it’s time to let them go.
Focus on building yourself up and securing a good job. When you have enough to leave do so. You will feel so much better and you won’t have to walk on eggshells the rest of your life.
