This is a very generic question but I think I know where you’re coming from.

A lot of people react to things rather than consider what effect they want. Look at what you’re doing, and ask yourself if you think this will get you the change or response you want.

i.e. Sometimes yelling, or flipping someone off at road rage can feel good, but it doesn’t get that driver to reconsider their poor driving. Give them a shameful finger wag and you’ve got them thinking…

Pause and reflect on what you expect your behavior to accomplish.