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Cake day: December 14th, 2024

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  • wisely@feddit.orgtomemes@lemmy.worldJust asking
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    1 month ago

    This right here is why I think trans rights hits so hard for so many people. Despite most not even knowing anyone trans.

    That targeted harassment against men is for minor stuff like being a good father. Having never met a trans woman, they assume they are “really a man”. It also doesn’t help that the most visible trans people are early on in the process. So they see a man who has way overshot those gender norms and that harassment goes to extreme levels. Despite them being an actual woman and not playing that game.

    This is just one example of how trans rights affect everyone. If someone can completely change genders without any harassment then people like stay at home dads can live in peace as well.


  • wisely@feddit.orgtomemes@lemmy.worldJust asking
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    1 month ago

    It takes strength and confidence to go against societal expectations. If anything I would say the man’s living his best life and nobody is going to peer pressure him into being miserable.

    The men pressuring others are miserable themselves and are only so uptight about it because someone forced that on them. It’s like some weird chain of people not minding their own business because if they can’t be free nobody can.


  • No worries I understand what you meant. I should probably also clarify that I intended that part for other readers.

    I know that there is a stereotype that autistic thinking is some kind of high level robotic empathy. It doesn’t feel like that for me at least. Instead of feeling a physical or emotional pain it’s an immediate pull and understanding towards kindness, fairness and easing suffering.

    Did I understand your post correctly that people do feel a physical pain response to others suffering? Somehow I made it to middle aged and never realized that if so. Thanks for the post, definitely one of the best I have ever seen and gives me a missing piece to reflect on. Which I will probably use later on to empathize with others who process empathy differently lol.


  • The sense of self might be different for everyone or even among families with similar genetics and experiences. I wouldn’t be surprised if there were multiple causes of autism.

    However, for me I would say that I have a weak sense of identity of a self. It’s a I’m here as I am, in this moment and couldn’t possibly be anything else. Social expectations or a manufactured identity are not even considered, and would take too much energy.

    You know how many people have a favorite team? They really identify with it, it’s THEIR favorite team. Like it is an inherent property of who they are.

    Well from my perspective I don’t feel that. There may be a team I had nostalgia for and some good memories with. But does that make it mine?

    However, if I was somehow officially a member of that team and people were telling me that I don’t belong there, I could not be personally convinced otherwise of something that is an obvious fact. I am, however I find myself to be and society can’t change that with words or expectations.


  • Interesting. As someone with autism I can definitely say that I don’t feel others pain directly like it was my own.

    Is this actually what others feel? The concept of that makes no sense to me. Does it really feel exactly the same as if your own, the pain is not a concept?

    My experience is that I empathize by understanding. I learn about different people’s experiences and am interested in philosophy and ethics. I have been through a lot of trauma myself.

    I can then extrapolate all of that and empathize with how others feel, and the struggles they have. Often I find myself in situations where I am upset by people’s callousness but nobody else seems to care. It’s only when it affects them emotionally that they take interest, and then they seem to become unstable and act out in harmful ways that might not fit the situation.

    My perspective does not feel like a robot high level logic. The empathy is immediately felt but there is an understanding behind it and separation from self. The sense of self is very weak if there at all. I often feel separated from my own physical pain and sensations.